by Harris Bloom
Bringers
Bringer Comic (n) - A comic who has to bring audience to a show in order to perform.
Bringer Show (n) - A show which features bringer comics.
Have you ever seen a comedy show where some of the comics onstage were so bad that you want to stab yourself, and yet, there was a pocket of people implausibly laughing at their jokes? If so, you were probably at a bringer show (or at least a show that featured bringer comics alongside pro comics).
Some clubs have shows that only feature bringer comics and advertise them as amateur shows... others mix pro-comics and bringer comics and call them "New Talent Shows" or some variation thereof, while other clubs will have bringer comics perform alongside pros without telling the audience that they are seeing amateurs. As the term "bringer" implies, the only reason these comics are allowed on stage is because they could corral five friends willing to pay a $12 cover and the price of two drinks on a Wednesday evening. Of course this practice leads to some memorable performances.
I did a bringer show a while ago, but no one will remember my performance. No, that night belonged to Comic Number 13.
He walked to the stage with a Discman in his ears and an unlit cigarette in his hand. His opening line?
"This fuckin' sucks! Putting me up like 13th...I fuckin' hate this club! I fuckin' hate stand up comedy!"
...and it went downhill from there.
At one point, with his headphones still on and his unlit cigarette dangling from his mouth, he asked where his friends were. They shouted out to him, and he screamed back, "This is for you guys! The rest can go fuck themselves!"
After declaring that he didn't need a mic, he stepped away from it. Other than the occasional "Fuckin'!" no one could make out a thing he said for at least a minute. One of the club's bookers was standing next to me and with her eyes ablaze, whispered "He is sooo banned!" I was surprised she didn't get him offstage earlier but then again, she may've been afraid of what he'd do.
He was either on drugs, or forgot to take his drugs.
Either way...he was unforgettable.
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